Saturday, November 30, 2013

Walk November 30, 2013.

Distance-4.5 km.
Avg. Spd.-5.9

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

November 27, 2013 Today's Walk

This evening's walk:

Distance-7 km.
Avg. Spd-6.2

Weather: -8 wind chill -16
Wind 23 km out of NW, gusts to 38 km/hr.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Morning Walk November 26, 2013.

Distance-7 km.
Avg. Spd-6 km/hr.

Temperature minus 1C. Wind out of the south @ 14km/hr.

Monday, November 25, 2013

November 25, 2013, Evening Walk

This evenings walk details:

Distance-3.8 km
Avg. Spd-6 km/hr.

November 25, 2013 Walk

This mornings walk truly was an enjoyable experience.
My son called and we both had time to chat.
And he talked! It was enjoyable. The weather was good November weather ... -12C, wind out of the south west 15 km/hr., gusts to 28 km/hr.

Through Stewart Park to the bank of the Tay River and back.
One set of 10 push-ups.

Distance 5.948 km.
Steps 6,733.
Time 1:22.
Calories 440.7.

On the way home I met a couple, Paul and Marilyn, from Carleton Place, Ontario.
We chatted about otters, golf, Marilyn's beautiful 3/4 length Arctic Goose down coat-which was an appealing gentle red colour. Paul had been a commercial diver for a number of years so we talked about kayaking also.

My winter running shoes are excellent!

Letter To A Friend

Goodbye for now #24!

Recently, I almost had an opportunity to rent a house.
It was an opportunity I had been hoping to find this last month or so.

Here is why I didn't end up renting the house.

Firstly, it was ideal. I was waiting for the call to sign the lease.
The call came but it was not to sign the lease.
It was the property owner calling to explain to me why she would not rent it to me because she had decided to rent it to another party.

The property owner is a friend. A very good person. That is why we are friends.

There is a family that is going through a challenging job loss/financial situation.
This couple had already viewed the home. They wanted to rent it for six months. However, they had to sell their home first due to the financial issues/income loss they are dealing with.
They are a family, a couple with children. The husband is gone all week working far from home and that job will end in the near future also.
They are trying to survive an economic crisis in their lives.

They had informed the owner that they would be in contact to commit to the rental by last Wednesday ... if their house sold. If it didn't sell then they would have to seek shelter with friends and family at separate locations.

So less than an hour before I was to sign the lease this past Saturday, my friend called and started to apologize and explain.
Within a sentence or two it was obvious this family needed this temporary rental.

Yes I liked it very much. It would have been wonderful to be there by this December first.

But ... I have a roof over my head!
I am not in crisis. I do not need this property to keep my family or life intact.

Friend is very complimentary, grateful and apologetic.

Helping people is not an option. Not for people like my friend.
Where possible and necessary it is required behaviour as part of our moral commitment, isn't it?

What a wonderful friend.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013


Well it's November 20.

Life is happening day by day. And it truly is a wonderful life.

I was supposed to be married this past September but we clearly did not pass the test of time. 

That's okay. Actually it's better than just "okay".
Now that my life is what it is, it is great.
I've adjusted well into living my life alone. I started the kayaking program which has enhanced my outdoor life immensely. It's a great fit with the camping.

I can retire in twenty five months if like. Being single is something I am very familiar with. Approaching retirement as a single will be a plus. I can plan with all the flexibility I need.

My house in London is a consideration. I think of it as a component of pension financials. It is also a good place to land if health becomes an issue.

As I peer into my retirement future I see a used motor home of about $10,000.00. Also a small used sailboat costing $5,000.00. Of course I have two kayaks already.
These toys could be easily stored if I am out of the country for 8 to 10 months at a time.

I intend to continue my kayak qualifications on an annual basis.
By 2016 I hope to be qualified to teach kayak instruction at the novice level.
My goal is to work part time teaching kayaking.

So I will build relationships in the kayak hobby.
Life is good. Moving on is always good.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Learning, Enjoying, Exercising.

Well it has been a very good 112 days.

It that time I was at the cottage in Fisher's Glen. I kayak/tripped for 3 nights at Doe Lake. And in early October, I had an overniter at my son's in London.

Of course, the kayak project recently was taken to the next level by the performance of two kayak rolls ... the first one on Oct. 16 and the second on the 18th.
All the rolls on the 20th were paddle float rolls, but they are extremely important and necessary to the production of technically correct rolls.

In short, the path of having fun and learning continues.

Of course the acquisition of the dry suit has extended my paddling season until the freeze up occurs. This is also a very significant learning opportunity. Cold water activity deserves the utmost respect and consideration. None the less, my three dry suit activities have been successful water lessons for me.
I am grateful for the fun and learning.
Freya Hoffmeister is on day 42 of her kayak circumference of South America.
And not so long ago Aleksander Doba of Police, Poland, kayaked from Dakar, Africa to Florida U.S.A.
He accomplished that historical feat in 99 days. He was also 65 years old when he did it!
I am humbled by Freya and Aleksander, and I also am very much inspired by their outstanding achievements.

Tuesday, October 01, 2013

Kayak Dreams

I took a couple of kayaking courses this past July. I had also taken a 4 hour introductory course back in 2011. I knew then that the kayak appealed to me.

There are a number of reasons for embracing the hobby of kayaking this year. I no longer had access to a canoe. Running affected my left thigh and paddle sports are a recommended substitute for running.

So this is a link to my kayak journal called Kayak Dreams:

So this year I acquired 2 new hobbies: walking and kayaking.

I think this is a good thing ... I could have started smoking, gambling, drugs and alcohol instead. Those are not good hobbies for me.
Walking and kayaking is worth the money I spend on them.
Just sayin' ... don't mean to sound to preachy!
Hell, I used to smoke and drink and ... well we don't need to go there!

So if you want to read about a little kayaking, help your self!



Sunday, July 07, 2013

Sunday Run

I was out early this morning, around 0700.

The run: 5.1 km, 3.2 miles. Steps 4,039. Calories 466. Time 36:06.
Avg. Speed 8.5 km/hr.

The walk includes warm up and cool down.
3.1 km, 2 miles. Steps 3,117. Calories 242. Time 44.08.

Both yesterday and today, after the run I walk over to the Tay River and have a 5 to 10 minute swim to cool off those warmed up muscles and bones. Then back home to rinse off the shirt and shorts and then shower up. Cold shower yesterday, hot one today.

Today I will eat just enough. Fruit and water for breakfast and kale and tilapia for an early supper.

Last night was a sin meal of cheeseburger with jalapenos and seasoned fries, washed down with a 20 ounce glass of draught lager. Very enjoyable.

I turned out the lights last night at 2330, so there was not a 1 am run. I slept soundly until 0415 this morning.

There will be a nap. Maybe soon.

Saturday, July 06, 2013

Running, Walking

So the running progress continues.

Only being able to achieve a distance of 4.1 km last night was noticeably humbling. Today's run of 5 km without a walk break certainly has encouraged my confidence. The mental persuasion I went through this morning to get myself to believe that it was not only possible, but actually a given, was a great process to go through. The thinking is the key. The reflexive persuasion makes it happen.

So I am very much hoping that I am not at work on the 20th of this month so that I can run in the 5k Over The Rainbow Run here in my adopted hometown of Perth.

I had planned that I would only run for 15 minutes at a time these next two weeks. Now with the impending race in two weeks, I would like to do the 30 minute 5k at least 3 times a week between now and then.
The other days of the week when I stick to the 15 minute run, I will try to add to the distance within the 15 minute time allowance. Currently I run a distance of 1.5 miles within the 15 minute window. Any increase will be appreciated by me. I am focusing on doing the best I can in a healthy fashion.

I still think of the Ottawa Half Marathon next end of May. I will train towards that goal still. I hope to compete in it.

It appears at this time I will have to run 5k tomorrow also.
I now have three pairs of running shoes: the Asics Kayano 19's which are starting to wear out. The Nimbus 11's and today's purchase of the GT 2170. Apparently the 2170's are the best selling running shoe in North America. The coach was kind enough to shave 10 bucks off the price so I paid just under $170.00. The support in that shoe is very significant. I should be able to wait until October before I need to purchase shoes again. The Kayano 20 comes out then.

This evening I celebrated my 197 pound body weight by going out and having a burger, fries and a large beer.
I was home just before ten, so I should be able to get out and run by 1 in the morning.

Running ... chasing the dream.

Good luck with your passions. Good luck to Sara who is training to run in a half marathon this September and started running just this past April.

Wednesday, July 03, 2013

Goodbye Country Walking

So now I am walking in town due to the luxury of a level, even surface. The difference is very noticeable. No ankle pain or discomfort whatsoever.

The second reason is that now when I walk, I also run for ten minutes during that walk time. Thirdly, I can now do night walks/runs in town with the  advantage of lit streets. Night walking/runs were not possible up until now.

Run one was a time of 10:22. Distance was 1.6 km or 5,249 feet. Steps 1,180. Calories 148. Average speed 9.3 km/h.

Run two was a time of 11:20. Distance-1.8 km or 1.19 miles.
Steps 1,346. Calories 166.3. Average speed-10.0 km/h.

The plan is to maintain runs of 10 minutes duration for this week and next. Every two weeks I will increase the run time by 5 minutes. That means the last week of August will be the first week of running for 30 minutes at a time. That means I should be able to run 9.7 miles in 72.75 minutes. With a race time of 90 minutes that leaves a remainder of 17.25 minutes for walk breaks if necessary.

The Glen Tay Block Race on August 29 is 9.7 miles. They want runners that are capable of running that distance in 90 minutes or less. So do I register or not? It may already be full. Some races fill up months in advance.

I may look for a race with a less ambitious distance, like 5 km.

With the 5 minute increase in running time every 14 days, that means by the beginning of January, I should be running for 100 minutes every time I run. If I never increase the speed between now and then,  I should be running 12 miles per 100 minutes.

That makes a 13.1 mile half marathon race at the end of May extremely possible, barring any injury/health issues.

The goal is set.

Sunday, June 30, 2013


So once again I have been gifted by life. I am a runner. Yesterdays run stats show that the run accomplished:

Distance= 1.2 km.
Time= 09:14
Calories= 106.4
Avg. Speed= 7.7

The stats for June 28 show:

Steps= 497
Distance= 0.6 km.
Time= 04:19
Calories= 50.3
Avg. Speed= 8.1

Yesterday after my run I did walk to Jebbs Creek and back. A distance of 10 Kms.

I enjoy walking/jogging out on the country roads but the slope of the road shoulder causes my left ankle pain due to the unevenness of the roadbed. The simple cure is to stay on sidewalks in town or due laps at the park or a combination of both. Such is a runners life!

Another bonus to the exercise program are the people I meet. Yesterday I met two people on my workout. Dave is a retired British Army intelligence officer. With reference to running, he represented the army in running meets. Obviously he is very accomplished.
The other very interesting person I met was Erica the dog-walker. Erica left retail after many years because she no longer enjoyed it. She happily pointed out that now she gets paid to exercise and she also gets to spend time with pets on a limited basis.

I have noticed that sometimes walking to Jebbs Creek and back sometimes gives me slight lower back pain/discomfort. I will see if my new level ground walks/runs in town alleviate this.

Walking and careful nutrition are still the basis of my health improvement/weight loss program. Once I am running at my goal level I will be able to gauge the results. Regardless, walking will always be a basis of my program.

I am training for two races for 2014: the Ottawa Half Marathon at the end of May and then the 8 Km. Perth Kilt Run in June. Of course whether I race or not is irrelevant. I train for health and nutrition and the learning process.

I am enjoying the passion immensely. I have lost 26 pounds so far.
Life is good! I am grateful!

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Walking Tall

Jebb here. (I am Jebb, Jebb I am.). As a matter of fact I walked through Jebbs Creek on todays walk to Port Elmsley Road and back. It was beautiful. For my last two walks I travelled the Glen Tay block. The Glenn Tay block is the 16.5 km journey that starts and ends in Perth, Ontario. It consists of walking, Christie Lake Road to Glen Tay Road and then the Scotch Line back to Perth. The geography is very forgiving, mostly flat.

Rideau Ferry Road provides the opportunity for a more intense walk. It is a rolling road with a number of knolls and a hill as well.
Both routes display the stunning natural geography that is so prevalent in this area.

Today's 3 hour and 11 minute walk burned 1,860 calories. It was 25,656 steps, 20.53 kms which is about 12.75 miles.

I have lost 20 pounds. My nutrition has improved a lot.
The best thing is that walking has turned me into a good sleeper. What a huge difference that is making in my daily life.

So it is a triple benefit: weight loss, good nutrition and healthier sleeping habits. Another plus is maintaining good posture. I also like the fact that walking is lower impact than jogging. That is something to consider as I approach my fifty-eighth birthday.

Chao for now.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

A Day in the Life-Walking in the Rain

How about walking in the rain with the one you love? Well I do walk alone. And I do love myself in a healthy, wholesome manner. I do consider myself good company out there.

I discovered a small lake on my walking route this morning. A lone loon took off as I arrived. During the walk I also spotted a couple of great blue herons in flight.

I went to bed early last night at 2230. I woke up, all slept out by 0350.

The day started with two glasses of water, 1/2 a cup of white grape juice and 3 teaspoons of cottage cheese and two of plain yogurt. That was followed by a ten minute meditation. Then a shower. I was dressed and out the door by 0550 for the start of my two hour and forty-five minute, 17.5 km. walk.

I went through the process of getting ready to go, only to discover it was drizzling rain. So off I walked into the early morning drizzle, content in the knowledge that I am a walking warrior. No mere spring drizzle is going to dampen my passion.

By the time I approached Jebbs Creek, 4 kilometers later, it was pouring. No big deal. I carry a zip lock bag to put my driver's license and phone into. It didn't pour for very long and I found it refreshing. It added to the beauty, to the natural environment.

So yes, I am a walking warrior, but a safe one too.

When there is traffic I walk on the shoulder of the road. It is gravel and it slows me down a bit, but it adds to the intensity of the walk. Once on the road I can assume more of a power walk. That is intense also because of the ability to walk significantly faster. The walking surface dictates the type of intensity.

It was a good walk: 17.5 km, 1,523 calories burned, and 22,134 steps.
I drank only 250 ml/8 oz of water and only had to urinate once.

On my return home I drank 750 ml of water and 250 ml of water mixed with whey protein. For breakfast I made 1 serving of organic oats with half a banana, cinnamon and maple syrup. I also ate three more teaspoons of cottage cheese.
Then I washed my shorts, shirt and socks and off to bed for a sound 2 1/2 hour slumber.

I awoke just after 1400. Got up, washed. I made some quinoa, (pronounced keenwah), and put it and cauliflower, diced chicken breast, garlic and artichokes into home-made chicken stock. So for lunch I had the soup. There is a fair amount of liquid in the soup so I will separate some of it from the solids and drink it in place of water sometimes.

I will be working tonight around midnight.

The car goes in for service Friday morning. A Spanish lesson on the weekend.

A day in the life.

Keep well all.

Sunday, May 26, 2013

It Was A Good Week!

But seriously ... life is always good. Life is a lot of fun too isn't it? Yes there are situations, stuff. Still it is good to get through the days and know that it is okay. And it is okay and better than that. I'm starting to take life a lot less seriously. Oh sure, I procrastinate sometimes. In the end it gets dealt with. It gets resolved. That is what makes life so interesting. Dealing with the issues in our lives the best way we are able to, and seeing, when all is said and done that we either handled it correctly or bounced the ball until we got it right.

The walking passion is starting to deliver results. A 15 pound reduction in weight. Feeling very good physically and mentally. I am enjoying the walks immensely. I get out of town and walk away from the main roads enjoying osprey and great blue herons and horses, cows and goats. Wind in the trees and sky and water.

It does take a time commitment of 2 hours per walk but the health and happiness are worth it. Just over 47 miles/75 km this week.
Tomorrow is a new day, a new week.
Of course half the week is urban walking in Scarborough. Busy, busy, busy!

The exercise is one half of the program and the diet is the other half. That is working very well. I am starting to understand how the exercise and diet are inseparable. The weight loss is only a benefit when the basis is a healthy intake of nutrition. The two go hand in hand. They both need to be present. And they are working together to achieve the weight loss goal.

Life is good.


PS: You an also check out also if you like.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Just Walking

Yet another beautiful day for a walk.

Here are the stats:

Kilometers-24.67. Steps-25,127. Calories burned-1,993 Time 4:14 (4 hours 14 minutes).

Avg spd ranged between 6.1 and 7.3.

For over the first hour and a half the average speed was 7.1 or more. So it was a pretty intense start.

I walked from my place in Perth to the middle of the bridge in beautiful downtown Rideau Ferry, population 400.

I took a bottle of water with me and grabbed some toonies and loonies to buy a bottle of water in Rideau Ferry for the 12.5 km walk home. Unfortunately I forgot to put the change in my pocket. It was not an ideal situation. I need to hydrate every 3 kms.
Nonetheless,  I soldiered on. About 7 kms north from Rideau Ferry I stopped to empty the few pesky bits of gravel in my shoes and to retie them. I stopped off to the side of the road and found a big rock in the shade to sit on. To my surprise, in the shaded grass was a  still sealed bottle of Coors Light. I love Coors Light. I looked at it for a few seconds and the words of Bryan Stevenson's grandma ran through my mind. "Always do the right thing even when the right thing is the hard thing.". God bless that wise woman who was born into slavery.
Anyway I left the beer.

Up the road I went another 3 kms, through Jebbs Creek, (Jebb I am, I am Jebb). I had been nursing this urge to urinate for a few kilometer's. So I decided once past the homes and out by the fields I would relieve myself. I found a suitable spot away from the road with the knowledge that cars on the road would not be able to see me.
I pulled down my zipper and thought I better scan the area one more time before I went any further an lo and behold, there was an OPP cruiser sitting back of the trees on the other side of the highway waiting for speeders. He was watching me. I did up my zipper and trudged onto the road again thinking what an interesting walk this was turning out to be.

I resolutely strode north avoiding looking at the cop as I went. No worries, he never spoke or approached. I found a spot up at Wildlife Road and continued onward to Perth.

I saw a number of osprey's. They are busy with their spring young right now. Just north of Rideau Ferry there is a colony of 5-6 nests with the mom's sitting on eggs or defending newborns.

All in all a wonderful walking adventure.
Once I got home I commenced hydrating generously.

For supper I used steam. Steamed potatoes, brussel sprouts and mushrooms, garlic and of course the steamed salmon. Cooking by steaming is my preferred method.

For desert, one last time at Dairy Queen. From now on it will be no, no, no!

To bed early tonight. Paperwork in the morning. New running shoes on Thursday ... I have earned them!

Good night all ... enjoy our lives!

Thanks for reading,


Friday, May 17, 2013

Walking Jebb

Another walk to Jebbs Creek and back. Today's walk was an intensive average speed of 7.3 kms./hr. for just over an hour. The remaining 20 minutes of the walk was 6.5 kms/hr avg spd. The weather was beautiful so the conditions were perfect.
So far this week I have walked 36.4 kms an burned 2,715 cals.

Good thing I treated myself to a medium Farmers Pizza from my local oven. This is the first time this month that I have eaten out of the home. $20.00 including tip.

Back to walking. I am down to 208 lbs in weight. So far I have lost 12 lbs and I am shedding the weight at a rate of 2lbs a week. I drink a lot of water. I also drink white grape juice and whey protein every second day. I eat a good amount of cottage cheese, plain yogurt and instant couscous. I love couscous along with marinated artichokes, fresh cremini mushrooms and steamed brussel sprouts.
I also eat asparagus once a week and broccoli too. I am still drinking organic milk and eating oatmeal. Real oatmeal, not the flavored instant junk.

Fast food except for pizza once a month at most is gone from my diet as well as bread. I eat a lot of salads and fruit.

The payoff is obvious. In spite of my wacky work non-schedule, my sleeping has improved and of course, exercise is always good for my brain.

Here I am at Jebbs Creek. This was one of the first places I fell in love with when I first arrived here just over three years ago. I have adopted the name as an alter persona and even had it imprinted on my work jacket.
Forgive the big, toothy, head shot. The walk to Jebbs Creek and back is about 11 kms. It is pretty out there. Farmers fields between here and there and then closer to there the little hamlet with it's houses. Ian Millar the Olympic horse jumping gold medal winner has his farm nearby.
My longer walks continue south of here to Elmgrove Rd. That is an 18 km long trek. It takes over 2 1/2 hours there and back. It burns well over a thousand calories.
Here is  shot of you know who at the longer location.
In closing, life is good. Summer is coming. I'm gonna get some new running shoes to walk in. Asics Kayano 19's. Now that I'm doing this kind of mileage the quality shoes are a better buy than the cheap runners.

Enjoy your life. Life is good.

Living Below My Means

After many years of wanting to ignore the facts of my spending habits, I somewhat recently started doing the very thing that motivates me and helps me to not waste my money.

I started keeping a written record of everything I spend money on. I call it a budget book and in it I write down the money coming into my hands and the money going out of my hands.
In any case it is a very good habit to acquire.

Take the subject of drinking coffee. I used to buy 2 to 5 coffees a day. Adjusting for my day quite often being 36 hours long, I believe that an average of 3 coffees in a 24 hour period is close to correct.

As the benchmark I have used a medium coffee from Tim's.

So 3 mediums at $1.60 and I always pay $2.00 for that coffee equals $6.00 per day x 365= $2,190.00.

Well a few months ago I started drinking only home brewed coffee. In the last couple of weeks I have stopped drinking coffee altogether.

This is just one example of how the "budget book" has improved my financial life.

Once I started writing things down I was able to see patterns. I was able to see clearly the costs of those patterns as well.

I used to have a really bad habit of being an impulse shopper. The only store I go to on a regular basis is the grocery store. That is where my impulse buying occurred. I would go to the grocery store for  2 bananas (.57) and a small container of cut up watermelon ($2.99) for a total of  $3.56. Sweet!

Then I would notice that 1 litre of coconut milk is only $4.99! And the cream filled bun is only .99! And that roasted chicken is 50% off at $5.99!
So now I have spent $15.56. That is $11.97 more than what I needed to spend. This behaviour of buying more than what was on my list happened nearly every time I went to the grocery store. It has cost me dearly!

In the last 72 days I have paid $3,700.00 towards my credit card balance. This would not have happened without this major shift in my thinking. Now this major financial change has been intentional. This credit card balance was supposed to be cleared off last year.
But it wasn't paid off because I wanted to move, and then there was the strike at work, and right after I recovered financially from that, the furnace and central air unit in my income property had to be replaced.

So now the concept of delayed gratification is firmly enforced in my habits, in my life.
There will not be any golfing this year, but at the end of the season I may get a very good deal on a golf membership for next year ... because I have earned it.

I will still rent a cottage for a week this August.
The only camping I will do is during my other 2 weeks of summer vacation.
The vacation to Central America that had been planned for March 2014 (March 1st off-season begins), will now be delayed until late 2014 or early 2015.

My new hobby is walking. I am losing weight! And a top quality pair of running shoes will only cost me $225.00. I am still walking in the $200.00 pair I bought 6 years ago for now. Walking is a cheap hobby ... a pair of running shoes is all you need. Forget the fancy shorts. Forget the fancy purchases. Be frugal!

I have reduced my church donation from $20.00 per visit to $5.00.

I have looked at my needs list. The question is "do I need it now"? Why now? Why not later?

I will continue Spanish lessons of $60.00/month.

To sum it all up ... if you'll pardon the pun, writing it all down allows me to see where I don't need to spend money.
It allows me to spend money on the things that will improve and enhance my quality of life.
It will allow me to pursue my passions.

It will allow me to be the minimalist that I have been in the other aspects of my life.

I am still doing laundry with the laundry detergent I made in November of 2011. One year and seven months of clean clothes without spending money on laundry detergent!

The key for me was writing it all down.
Now I understand. It doesn't matter how much or how little I earn. All that matters is what I spend.

Finally, I am living below my means.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

My Name Is Mike

My name is Mike.
I am not who they said I was.
I am not what they said I am.

I am not what I was.
I am not what I used to be.

I am not the victim.
I am not the dysfunction that they bequeathed to me.

I am part love.
I am part hope and faith.

I am true with trust.
I am sweet with kindness.

And I am smart with curiosity.
Open with wonder.

I am blessed with value.
And I stand on principle.

My life is not fear.
I judge myself, and do not accept judgement.

I claim only what is mine.
Only what I am.

Only who I choose to be.

My name is Mike.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Freedom Friday Night!

Sometimes I choose to work more than I know I should. These past three days I worked a lot because:

1) I wanted to get my miles (150 miles short).
2) I wanted to be home tonight because I wanted to write this bitchin' post about bitching about working too much.
Really I just wanted to have a Friday night at home.

So the plan is working except there is no need to bitch Baby!

Just for the record, life is not a bitch, it is a gift. A wonderful journey through the universe of time and space.

A supper of salad, wine, water and raisin toast with butter.

I would like to get my miles for next month, and maybe get a few days off. Camping has been on my mind a lot these last few days. It's time to drag out the gear and test it all before I get a mile or two into the bush.

I'm digging my singleness and enjoying the freedom of both having time to myself and also finding new avenues to socialise.

I'm finding that to be a "single" or a "lone" is actually broadening my mind. It is freeing to socialise as a single I find. When I was half of a couple, we used to spend a lot of time doing things as a couple. Of course my wacky "non-schedule" or non-existent schedule was responsible for that to a large degree. However it is quite enjoyable to be with a group of people and work the group alone.

Life is busy but enjoyable.

Friday, January 11, 2013


It is so wonderful to have the friends we have in our lives. I am grateful for them, as we all should be.

We should all take conscious, intentional action to better ourselves. We all have a responsibility not only to heal ourselves if need be, but indeed to actively pursue an agenda or program of self-improvement on a daily basis. We are better off for it. Our lives improve. Our relationships with family and friends function with peace, love and happiness. All is good.

I recently read a quote by none other than Ms. Bonnie Raitt, musician and artist extrordinaire. Her remarks went something like this: Religion is for those who want to avoid going to hell. Spirituality, on the other hand, is for those of us who have already been there. How true Bonnie, thank you for sharing that insight into my life. Lol!

I know a little about self-improvement and recovery, and I am extremely grateful for that.
I am a bonafide expert on a life gone wrong, a life that for decades existed only with extreme dysfunction, chronic depression and dump truck loads full of neediness. A desparate, enduring torture.
On the inside.

Gratefully, I was unable to self-destruct in spite of the condition of my mind, my life.
Fortunately, in 2005 I commenced a program of recovery and self-improvement.
That program has raised and improved my life substantially.

Here is the situation. Decades ago I met a friend. On many levels, he is wonderful person.
Unfortunately he still exists at somewhat the same level of dysfunction. That same moral vacuum we both dwelt in when we met 30 years ago. I changed and with that change came clarity and vision and morality. My life became a life worth living. A very happy, responsible life. A total life makeover. And I'm cute too.
So even though I still like my friend, or at times still somewhat like him, the relationship takes a lot of work on my part for me to still accept a dysfunction that has become totally unacceptable in my own life.
I can maintain this for the most part. However it becomes extremely difficult for me to morally accept the dishonesty and other moral shortcomings that he still desparately and so needily clings to and embraces.

This is Canada. There is help for those who want it and are willing to work for it. I love Canada.

I sought and worked very hard for the help I needed and got. We all have a responsibility, a moral obligation to heal ourselves if we are able to. I am not here to pass judgement on those who do not agree with the foregoing principle.

I hope that he realises after my last communication to him about honesty, that his using the basis of our friendship to obtain goods and services valued at thousands of dollars from me, for his personal benefit could be an impediment to our continued friendship. This is the second time he has attempted this same, highly manipulative, technique. In the future his continued fishing for consideration will not bode well for our friendship.

So that is the item I write about today. It is fine that I was able to crawl out of the swamp of a life gone wrong. However I am tired of overlooking and excusing bad behaviour, the repeated attempts to take advantage.
The patience is wearing thin as I age. As I get older it is obvious how valuable my remaining time is.
I am no longer willing to waste time on someone who repeatedly refuses help and seems to enjoy and delight in his dysfunction.

I hope he takes the steps necessary to improve his life.

Good luck, dear friend. Stop crying for help. Stop punishing yourself. Get up and get on with it.


 A friend.

Monday, January 07, 2013

Praying For Peace

So here is the question that I am asking: In order to pray, does one have to believe in God?

Here is my answer: I believe it is possible to believe in prayer without believing in God.

Prayer and meditation has proved to be an asset to my time.